The mom I vowed I would never become

As I sit here writing, I look around my house and see that it is basically totally dirty, messy and disheveled.  It drives me crazy to be perfectly honest.  There are several baskets of folded and unfolded laundry laying around, toys on the floor, dishes and food items left out.  And dare I mention how filthy my socks were after walking around on the kitchen floor and carpet all day!

Oh, but there were days when I had no children or only one child.  I was Miss Perfection living in Perfect Land.  Everything had a place, and everything was in its place. Not a dish was left in the sink or on the counter before going to bed.  I put my laundry away while it was still hot out of the dryer for crying out loud!  I saw other moms' houses that looked similar to the way my own looks currently.  As I politely insisted that I didn't care how clean their home was, or that the bathroom looked like it just got hit by an atomic waste bomb, I inwardly gawked at how careless and disorganized she must be for allowing such filth and chaos.  I would then pridefully marvel at how pristine my floors were.  So clean that you could in fact eat off of them.  So just the fact that I was sitting on this mother's stained couch was a leap for me.  I vowed to myself that I would never become "that mom".  

That was me... Three kids and about four years ago.  The above condition of my home has become my new norm and reality (not forever I do hope!).  And as much of a stretch this new way of life truly is, I have somehow begun to find freedom in it.  Freedom in the midst of chaos.  Who would have thought?  

Now freedom comes with a price, mind you.  It has not been easy to actively chose to ignore the mess so that I could instead spend quality time with my kids and husband.  I have to do this on purpose.  I've had to rise above the mess- and that only by the grace of God- and objectively survey the things that are truly important.  The dishes and laundry and hairballs on the carpet make their best effort to suck me back into a frantic cleaning frenzy.  But I choose to play trucks with my son.  I choose to rock my baby girl to sleep.  I choose to snuggle and give my growing-up-ever-so-quickly daughter a scratch back.  

The dishes will always be there, but.... Well, the dishes will still always be there!  Really though, these precious gifts that we call children grow up quickly and change by the minute.  In the long run, when they are grown, what will I remember?  Will I look back and wish that I hadn't let my bathrooms get so dirty or that I did a better job keeping the dishes under control?  No, I think I will look back and see the times I spent with my family.  And I hope that I am content and filled to overflowing with joy at the memories and relationships we built together!  One messy kitchen at a time :)

Thea's birth story

Welcome to Motherhood Redeemed! I wanted to share the story of Thea Joy's birth as my very first blog post! And it's actually quite perfect timing because this blog will be dedicated to many things mothering, including birth. So here's the story of how Thea made her way into this world and into our lives...

I labored at home all morning on Monday, October 28th but had a couple false alarms so I wasn't getting my hopes up too high. CJ went to work and then labor starting getting intense. I was trying to take care of Addison and Carter at the same time too! I called my midwife and she said she felt like it was time even though my contractions were inconsistent. So CJ came home and we headed to the birth center... After I cleaned the house of course! I wasn't about to leave the house messy! 

Two of my best friends met us there shortly after. I was 6-7cm dilated when I arrived. And for the next 4-5 hours, we laughed and chatted through all my contractions and has SO much fun! It was really such a joy-filled and fun time. I remember thinking that I shouldn't be having so much fun. This was labor for crying out loud! As delivery got closer though, I became more serious and was ready to get down to business. So I got in the tub. The next hour or so was basically grueling and painful. There's no sugar-coating that fact. My two friends kept praying and encouraging me with things God placed on their hearts to help me get through it. I asked my midwife to check me by then because I was getting tired and just wanted an idea of how much longer I had to go. I was 8cm and discouraged. I was at the point where I was feeling totally done and exhausted. 

I had been in the tub for quite a while and in the same position, and my legs were cramping up. So I got up to change positions. As soon I sat up, my water broke! And no joke, she just about flew out. I started freaking out! I'm like, oh my God, what do I do?? I was halfway in the water, and my midwife heatedly said, "Brandy, you need to be either in the water or out of the water! You have to change positions!" So I very uncomfortably turned over and went into a laying down position in the tub. I pushed TWICE and she was out! All I could think was, "We did it! Finally!" Even though it wasn't really that long, labor and delivery is tough! Thea was born that night at 7:32pm at 7lbs. 2oz.

 She breast fed immediately for 45 minutes straight! So we got a really great start with that and now she eats like a champ! The aftermath was a little challenging however. I had lost quite a bit of blood during the delivery and passed out twice. They ended up giving me a bag of fluids and drawing a bit of blood to find out what was happening. This later revealed that because of the blood loss, I became anemic. So my recovery was challenging for a few days, but God healed me very quickly and I have bounced back much quicker than was predicted! I'm feeling like myself again, minus the normal sleep deprivation. I believed God for an "Ephesians 3:20" birth experience, and He was so faithful to bless me with that!

Ephesians 3:20 Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or imagine according to the power that is at work within us.